Juliana Gabrielle . . . our daughter??

Hello friends and family! So - you want to know, hunh? :) Well - so do we! Here's what we do know:

We had to wait over the Labor Day weekend, but on Wednesday (Sept 6th), I got an e-mail from Lucy (our agency director) stating that she finally got some info on the little girl, but it was still in Spanish and didn't look like it had much medical info or any pictures. She wanted to know if we wanted to wait till she got everything or just to go ahead and send what she had (she was leaving for Haiti in the morning). I asked for what she had (of course!) and later told Tammy (Lucy's Guatemala adoption helper/advocate) to go ahead and send me the documents in Spanish (she had called at 5pm saying they hadn't received the translations yet). We have 2 neighbors that speak fluent Spanish (one is from Spain and the other from Mexico) - so I think we could get it translated! :) I actually could understand most of it, and had a couple friends (not even my neighbors) help with the rest.
In the letter, the lawyer said she would fax the medical info and email some pics the next morning (Thursday). Well - it's now monday and we still have not heard back from the lawyer. My agency tried contacting her again today. Hmmm . . . . . what's going on Lord? It is hard to feel like we have a "real" referral, as we don't have all the info. Even Lucy said the same thing. :) As you can imagine - I check my e-mail even more frequently throughout the day (is that even possible?!) just waiting for the pics and info! Though - I do still trust that it's all in God's timing as the past 2 weeks have been quite stressful for me with school starting and all the new schedules, etc. (teaching Ty at home MWF) - so, not having to figure out the finances to accept a referral yet, has been a blessing. God has a reason and has His ways! They are definitely NOT my ways!

The other interesting thing that the Lord has done lately . . . is to keep making me cry! . . . or was that my hormones? Well, I can blame that on God too! :) No, seriously - last night at our monthly Mei Ming (adoption ministry) meeting - we were praying for the Chinese orphans and adoptions and I was totally overtaken! I saw a picture of a huge wave, like a Tsunami, sweep over the land in China and wash through an orphanage (or several) and over all the kids - submerging them. I just started to cry. I wanted to sob uncontrolably - but held it in. I didn't know what it meant. I didn't think it was a literal interpretation, but it still made me cry. Then I felt like God told me that this was a picture of His love for these children - the orphaned, and was I ready to experience it? . . . . I would love to say - yes I am - but when you do, it's too overwhelming. Your heart is full of love and heartache all at once - and the power of it overwhelms you like a Tsunami wave! I didn't like feeling out of control in it, but I do want more of His heart - it's just hard to handle.

Then today, somehow, in one of my many online adventures, I ended up at a website for US kids that needed adopting. I came across this little girl - Carolina. I could not stop crying for over an hour. I would slowly stop, but as soon as I thought about her, or any other orphan for that matter, I just started weeping uncontrollably. And of course my mind just went crazy trying to figure out why the spigots in my eyes wouldn't shut off! Was it just my "mother's heart" feeling for this child (I was crying as if she was my own child just diagnosed with end stage renal disease. I just wanted to take her home and love on her!)? Was it the shame I felt for wanting a "healthy" child? Was it the desire to help this little girl? Was it the feeling of sadness and frustration at the unfairness in life for these little ones? Was it God? Was it my hormones? Was it just stress??. . . . . What was going on? I had to lay down on my bed and weep before God and pray for this little girl, and others like her that I have seen recently online, who may never be adopted because of their "special needs" - but who desperately want and need a loving family of their own! I called and talked with (more like sobbed to) my mom and had her pray for me, and that seemed to finally slow the stream of tears to a trickle and eventually they stopped altogether (thankfully!). But I'm still not 100% sure of what the intense emotions were all about with this girl. I had almost started to cry when seeing a few other kids before - but nothing like this!

Anyways . . . . I'll stop telling you my "sob stories". :) hee, hee.

So - Back to our referral . . . Pray that we get the final info on little Juliana Gabrielle (that's her birth name) so that we can make a decision. She is 2 1/2 years old (born March 2nd) - which is right about the age I was thinking we would get. By the time we brought her home, she would be 3 probably - or almost 3. Meg plays well with the 3 year old down the street, and I think she would like being a "big sister" to a "little sister", instead of having a sister almost her age. We'll see.

Also - continued prayer for:
- Adoption Finances (haven't heard back from the grant application; am planning of having a garage sale this fall; we're still selling Ent. Books, and starting to collect ink and laser cartridges for recycling; plus there are some other possible fundraising ideas that we haven't approached or tried yet; and finally - looking into low interest loans or 0% credit cards . . . we'll see where God leads)
- Info to arrive soon!
- Coverage for our whole family! - we have felt very attacked lately (J's stress at work, me with my new, busy schedule of schooling and "taxi" mom, etc, etc, etc)
- Orphans around the world - to be released to families that will love and care for them!

Thanks so much you guys! We love and appreciate you - as always!!!!!

- Lori :)
ps - Hopefully our next news will be tears of JOY when we accept a referral! I hope so!

Dossier is Finished . . . I hope!

Sorry so long between posts - not much exciting happening. . . . .But - I think I can safely say that our dossier is officially finished! Our last form (the Home Study agency's license copy) was authenticated at the State and Consulate levels and was received in KY at KAS on Friday! Yeah! Now they can send it to Guatemala for translation into Spanish. :) I guess that is exciting!

About a week and a half ago, our agency director came back from her trip to Guatemala. I was anxious to hear if she had any good news for us. On that tuesday, she responded to an email of mine and said that she "may have a referral of a toddler girl" for us "soon". I was thinking - within a few days! But no phone call or email the rest of that week. This past monday, I emailed again. She said that she was quite frustrated as she had called Guatemala every day the last week and had not heard back from the attorney who had told her about the little girl. As of this friday, she still hadn't heard, despite her "pestering". Hmmm . . . . did the atty fall off the face of the earth? Is this delay a ploy of the enemy or the plan of God? We are praying that, if she is meant to be our daughter, God will release her to us soon. If she is not meant to be our daughter - then the delay is fine (and justified). Only God knows. I feel at peace about it, even though my "mother's heart" and curiosity are anxious to see who our daughter will be. I feel like I'm in my second trimester of pregnancy and I am waiting to get my ultrasound to see what I'm having! :) The day can't come quick enough! :) Once we get our referral though, it will still be 4-7 months till we bring her home. Having her home for Christmas is getting slimmer and slimmer. :(

I still check the precious.org site quite frequently looking at the little babies and kids that need to be adopted. I've fallen in love with quite a few of them. Several of them were at another agency that I had contemplated switching to when we switched to KAS, but I just didn't feel a peace about them when I talked with their staff a couple times. They weren't mean or anything - I just didn't get that inner peace like I did with KAS. . . . . Gotta follow the "Peace" - even if it means we have to wait a little longer. God knows our needs, wants, desires, etc. I trust Him 100%. Plus - we still need about $8000 to be able to accept a referral, and then we'll need another $11,000 towards the end of the adoption process. We are still in the process of trying to come up with the money. On that topic though - we have been blessed recently with 2 $500 checks to be applied towards our adoption! :) PTL! God is good! Oh yeah - and the blessing of the new van couldn't have come at a better time. We gave our old car to my parents, and just a little while later, my mom's car completely died!! They would have been scrambling to get a new car, but now they can at least take their time and still get around town. Thank you God!

Well guys - thanks again for all your prayers. Pray for the release of our daughter, and the finances needed to bring her home. Pray for wisdom as to how to bring in the finances (extra job, loans, grants, fundraisers, etc). Thanks so much for the encouragement!

Blessings today!
Lori :)

ps - We do have the Norfolk entertainment books in, so let me know if you need one. They are regularily $30 (or $32 online), but we are selling them for $25 (unless you want to give us $30 for it. :) hee, hee). You get a free $25 gift cert to a local restaraunt just for registering your book online! We've already used our certificate at Taverna in Va Beach for our Anniversary. Very yummy! So it's like getting a free book basically! You'll be glad you got one! Lots of great coupons!!!!

Entertainment books are in!

The Norfolk/Hampton Roads Entertainment books are in! You can save alot of money on places you already may visit (ie - Bruster's, Fazoli's, McDonald's, Burger King, IHOP, Bennigan's, Kyoto Japanese, Children's Museum of VA, The VA Zoo, etc). Email or call us for your copy! They are only $25 through us (if you order online - you may be charged a $5 S&H fee - so get one directly from us to save you some money). You can order online through the link in the sidebar or click on this title. You can even order a book for someone in other cities - so pass this info on! Thanks.
We really appreciate it!
Lori :)

Home study license update

Praise God! :) Not only did I receive the new copy of the HS license with a date by the notary's signiture, but it is a different license all together. Why is that good? Because I didn't even notice that the last one was a Maryland license and the new one is a Virginia license. We, obviously, live in Virginia and used the Virginia office - so that is the one I needed to begin with. Also, the MD license expired in Jan 07 (which could still be when our adoption is in process) and the VA one doesn't expire till March 09! PTL for His divine providence in allowing us to get the right form before we sent if off through all the authentications, etc. God is good!
Just wanted to let you know! The license is on it's way to Richmond for state authentication. Yeah!
Later!
Lori :)

Esther was adopted!

Hello all! Ok - before I explain the title, let me catch you up. Sorry I haven't updated sooner - but as usual, it's been another busy week!

Jacob surgery went beautifully! Thank you all for praying! I could tell he was bathed in prayer. He was not scared (he was actually excited to go smell the grape flavored mask in the OR) and recovered 4 times quicker than my other boys ever did from surgery! I barely had time to sit down in the recovery area before they told us we could go home! No nausea or vomiting, no excessive sleepiness, etc. For those that didn't know - Jake has had several styes in his lower eyelids this last year, and ended up with several Chalazions on the inside and outside of both lids. They were never going to go away (and people always asked what was wrong with his eyes because of the red spots, etc) - so they had to surgically remove them. It was a short surgery, but it did require general anesthesia. Anyways - his eyelids are looking much better! A little redness still, but on the mend, and definitely better than before! Oh yah - and today is his 4th b-day! Happy Birthday Jacob!!

As for the adoption - I got a call from KAS that our dossier looked great and was all done . . . . except for . . . . . . (????Hunh??? Something else?) . . . we were missing the notarized, authenticated (x2) copy of our home study agency's license. ???? We were never even told we needed it! Oh well. One of these days we will actually be DONE with this paperwork (I hope). So I called and left a message at our HS agency and didn't hear back from them. Left another message this past monday - and they finally called me back. They had mailed out the copy on friday, so I should recieve it soon. It actually did come in the mail on monday, and I was all ready to send it off to be authenticated when I realized that the notary didn't date her signiture. I wasn't sure if she had to or not - but I thought that was pretty standard. I called my agency, and they said it may be fine how it is, but they would rather just get it done right ("since you don't have a referral yet and we are not in a need to rush things" . . . why do they keep saying that to me? I would LOVE to have a referral and be in a rush! :) Oh well). So - I called the HS agency back and requested to get one with a date on it. She said she would do it that day and get it in the mail. I expeceted to receive it Wed or Thursday - but didn't. Hopefully today. So . . .. when that is all authenticated . . . THEN we will be PAPER READY! yeah!

Lucy, the director of KAS, is still in Guatemala and should be returning tomorrow. Please pray for her safe return. I, of course, am hoping that she has found our daughter with the help of her lawyer, but I'm not gonna hold my breath. I do have a sense of peace these past 2 months that it's all in God's timing and His big, capable hands. In my devotions today (reading from Cynthia Heald's book "A Woman's Journey to the Heart of God"), I read a wonderful statement about waiting. This definition, of the value of waiting, was written by A.B. Davidson - "To wait is not merely to remain impassive. It is to expect - to look for with patience, and also with submission. It is to long for, but not impatiently; to look for, but no to fret at the delay; to watch for, but not restlessly." That described how I feel exactly!! With each delay, I don't have that feeling of fret or panic, but peace. I long for, expect, look for and watch for the arrival of my daughter - but it has been filled with a strong peace! I can't explain it any other way. PTL that I know the author of that peace and can lean on Him during this process! There are so many adoptive parents who live in fear during the whole process. Anyways . . . . I'll keep you updated on whether we get a referral soon (or not).

As for Esther . . . . . .
I was praying this morning for my daughter. Because we are looking for a 2-5 year old, we have not decided on what to name her, as she may end up keeping her name (especially if she is older). I have liked the name Kathryn Grace (meaning "Pure, virginal" and "Grace of God"). My oldest son picked out Kaitlyn or Kathryn when I was pregnant with Jacob (and wanted to still call him that even after we found out it was a boy! I don't think so!). Anyways - I was asking God what name he would want for our daughter. Would we just keep her name, or is there another name for her? What will she be like? Etc. God brought Esther to my mind - not necessarily the name, but the person and the story. I've always liked the story of Esther (a beautiful young lady who gets chosen to be queen and helps to save her people!! What little girl wouldn't fantasize about being her?!) I flipped open the Bible to Esther and started reading. Besides the fact that Esther was a "virgin" (see Kathryn's meaning above), what jumped out immediately to me (that I had never noticed before at all!!!) was that Esther was adopted!!! (So - Tait's, you have the "Tarzan effect", but I have the "Esther effect"! :) hee, hee.) Esther 2:7 - "Mordecai had a cousin named Hadasah, whom he had brought up because she had neither father or mother. This girl, who was also known as Esther, was lovely in form and features, and Mordecai had taken her as his own daughter when her father and mother died." vs. 15 - "When the turn came for Esther (the girl Mordecai had ADOPTED . . . )". She also left her "people" to go live with the King (who was a totally different nationality), and God used that to help her save "her people"! What a beautiful story of God's Divine Grace! I feel like God was saying that our daughter would have an Esther spirit - beautiful, pure, good heart, smart, (of course all the things we all desire for our kids!!), and that the reason God is allowing her to join our family is not to leave her "people" behind, but to be able to have an impact on them in the future! She HAS to leave them to save them (spiritually, physically, etc - I don't know. all of the above?)! God's plans are perfect! Aren't they?! So . . . .as is God's usual style - my question wasn't really answered directly (Jesus always spoke in parables too!) - but what a picture and reassurance of God's love and plans He has for our daughter! It just tickles me pick and lifts my spirits!

The great news is - that God has awesome plans for each and every one of us! It may not be to save a whole nation, or to find the cure for cancer, but the impact your life has on even just one little child (or adult) - can have an everlasting consequence and can potentially touch millions of lives thereafter!! Just think if Billy Graham had never accepted the Lord as Savior! Even though he was raised in church, he had a time of wrestling with the issue of whether the Bible was the infallible word of God while he was at college. What if Henrietta Mears had not helped him with that issue? What if Forest Hope Christian camp had never been started (where Graham made the decision that the Bible was in fact God's infallible words and decided to follow God wholeheartedly)? Just one decision we make, one life we touch, can potentially reach into the millions because of our commitment to follow Christ and His will for our lives (even if it SEEMS that we are not doing anything"big" for God). So - keep on following God's calling on your life - whether it's to adopt, support adoption, be a stay at home mom, a working mom, etc. Just make sure you are doing what God wants you to do and you can't go wrong!!! :)

God bless you all today! Sorry this ended up being so long - but I had to share what was on my heart! Hope it didn't put you to sleep. :)
Thanks for your support and prayers!
Blessings!
Lori :)